Don't Give Up!

I wanted to write you today and share something really personal.  If you've ever battled your weight, some of this will probably feel incredibly familiar to you.  Over the last several years I really let myself get into a bad place physically and emotionally.  I didn't value myself enough to make changes that would really manifest into something meaningful for my physical well-being.  Every day was a constant barrage of negative thoughts, beating myself up for being so weak, and then trying to comfort that hurt with food.  it's a stupid cycle to get into but, that is where I found myself.  Many times I would utter the words, "I'm ok with how I look", but that was a lie spoken by my inner voice to keep me from succeeding.

Now that I am back on track, (down 15lbs thank you very much!) I want to speak to you about where you are in your life's journey.  Don't let that inner voice drag you down.  Tell it to shut the hell up.  You are worth getting yourself healthy.  You are worth being around for your family and friends.  You. Are. Worth. It.  Negative thoughts result in negative results.  Love yourself enough to make even just some small changes today.  Maybe you get out and walk for 15 minutes.  Don't walk at a breakneck speed, just get out there and move.  Maybe, instead of soda with lunch, you have water with lemon.  Take some small steps just for you.  Add a new small step each day or each week and you will be surprised at how they add up into big changes for you.

I could sit and be extremely pissed at myself all day for essentially wasting years of my life by being obese but that would not be productive.  Instead, I thank me for not giving up on myself, for saying out loud, "I'm worth it!!" and meaning it.  Do something kind for yourself today and above all, do not give up.  If I can do this, you can do this and that is a fact.  I am someone who detested exercise and would revolt at the thought of eating the way I am right now.

I'm not saying you need to do what I'm doing as far as eating or exercising goes.  What I'm doing works for me.  But love yourself enough to explore what will work for you.  There is something out there for everyone and every lifestyle you just have to find the changes you can live with and start there.  I'm in your corner, ready to cheer you on!!  Don't give up.  Set small goals and shout from the rooftops when you achieve them.  Just don't give up!!!

When Life Hands You Lemons....

You know what? Sometimes, things happen and there is no rhyme or reason to it. They just happen and you've got to learn to roll with it. Otherwise, you'll get rolled over and what fun is that going to be?? After I met with the dermatologist the other day, she told me that I have a form of eczema as well as a mild case of rosacea. Man, can I just tell you that was NOT what I wanted to hear. It makes dealing with my skin a bit more challenging and, for the time being, I'm on some very pricey medicated creams and face wash. Oh well. What can one do? Deal with it. That's what. So, now that I now why my face has been looking like a chemical peel gone wrong, now I can focus on getting myself in shape.

This year, I turn 40. Yep, the big 4-0. Oh lordy look who's forty. I don't feel like I'm older than 25 and my husband would swear that at heart, I'm still a teenybopper. I do love me some pop music. :) But since this year is such a big deal birthday, I promised myself this was going to be the year that I got into shape. This year is supposed to be one where I am kinder to myself. So far, that is a goal that has gone unaccomplished. Now, it's time to get serious. My birthday is in October and, I'm not being unrealistic and expecting to be 120lbs by then. Or ever. But I do want to be eating better, eating more home-cooked meals and less fast food. I want to be MOVING a lot more than I do now. And those are all things that can be done, I just have to get off my tookus and do them!!

Today, my sister and I got together and she is helping me get back into the swing of cooking at home. The last few years have been pretty crazy here and I didn't deal with it well at all. My husband was hardly ever home for dinner and my kids hate to eat anything that isn't a nugget or cheese pizza. So it seemed like a lot of work to cook a full-on dinner just for me. Now I know though that the kids and I all need to eat better than we do and all it takes is a little planning. My sister also has a food blog called, For the Love of Food. She is a great cook and makes many things from scratch as well as on a budget. She does a great job of tentatively planning the weekly menu and sticking to it. Click on the link above and check out her blog when you get a chance. You'll be glad you did. And tell her I sent you!!

Anyway, I hope you will continue to stick with me as I pick up the pace and get this party started. This is the year of living better and treating myself with kindness. Won't you do it, too? You will thank yourself for it later. :)

Heading to the dermatologist today

My skin has been an absolute MESS lately so, out of desperation because nothing else I have tried is working, I'm going to the dermatologist today. I suspect that I will be making some dietary changes after this visit so look for an update on that. Of course, with access to the internet and WebMD I have already self-diagnosed. LOL And the information I've read thus far leads me to believe that I will see some positive changes by eliminating yeast and sugar from my diet. So, we'll see. My appointment is late this afternoon. Wish me luck!!

My Crazy Journey

When I started this blog I hoped I would be a lot thinner and would have enjoyed many delectable, home-prepared gourmet meals. What I have learned about myself is, I find that kind of lifestyle very difficult to maintain. For a long time, I was allowing other things to get in the way and, for the last several months, we have not been eating much prepared at home. Thankfully though, that has really turned around. I have found myself enjoying being in the kitchen again after hating it for a while. And I'm also on a journey to feed my soul along with my body and I am going to use this blog as a platform to share what happens along the way. Already, my body feels at peace knowing that it is going to get the sustenance it needs, not only with nutrients but with intangible things that only the spirit can feel.

So I hope you will join me as I continue on my path with all the twists and turns. I am not as concerned about being thin anymore. Now I just want to be happy. :)